Internet Humor
Death of a Senator:
A powerful senator dies after a prolonged illness. His
soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
"Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "Before
you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around
these parts, you see, so we’re not sure what to do with you."
"No problem,
just let me in," says the guy.
"Well, I’d like to but I have orders
from higher up. What we’ll do is have you spend one day in Hell and one in Heaven.
Then you can choose where to spend eternity."
"Really, I’ve made up my mind. I want to be in
Heaven," says the senator.
"I’m sorry but we have our rules." And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator
and he goes down, down, down to Hell. The doors open and he finds himself in
the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a club and standing in
front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.
Everyone is very happy and in evening attire. They run to greet him, hug him,
and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense
of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster and
caviar.
Also present is the Devil, who really is a very friendly
guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good
time that before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a big
hug and waves while the elevator rises.
The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on
Heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him. "Now it’s time to visit Heaven." So
twenty-four hours pass with the head of state joining a group of contented souls moving
from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and,
before he realizes it, the twenty-four hours have gone by and St. Peter returns."Well
then, you’ve spent a day in Hell and another in Heaven. Now choose your eternity."
He reflects for a minute; then the senator answers,
"Well, I would never have said it. I mean Heaven has been delightful, but
I think I would be better off in Hell."
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes
down, down, down to Hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he is in the
middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends,
dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags. The Devil
comes over to him and lays his arm on his neck. "I don’t understand,"
stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course
and club and we ate lobster and caviar and danced and had a great time. Now
all there is, is a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable.
The Devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday
we were campaigning…Today you voted for us!"